Ahhhhh, South Carolina. Palmetto State. Home of smiling faces and beautiful places, smiling Confederates serving beautiful mustard BBQ, smiling gas station signs with beautiful prices, interstates more bumpy and jarring than I-30 in Arkansas, and home to .... ummm, errrr, ahhhhhh, somebody.
Its flag is my favorite of the 50 states. Unlike Alabama (a design so complex that even a fetus could draw it -- heck, drop the red "X" and you'd have a dandy surrender flag!) or Georgia (let's see, what flag will we have this week? Denny's placemat ... or battle flag ... or convoluted Confederate compromise? Personally I think a "Pabst Blue Ribbon" logo would be perfect as Georgia's state flag, but anyway...), South Carolina's flag is almost exotic, a very dignified portrayal of its state tree -- the Palmetto -- in a nighttime setting (hence, the accompanying crescent).
I love it, what can I say?
Matter of fact, there's only one thing I'd change about our lovely land across the Savannah River:
Their incredibly, terribly and excruciatingly DULL and BORING state highway route markers. Basic, bland black on white. Just like a speed limit sign. Imagine some de-d'DEE motorist confusing the two.
"Where's the fire, boy?"
"Ummm, in your eyes, officer."
"Do you know I clocked you going 186 MPH?"
"I thought that's what the sign said."
"No, dummy, you're on HIGHWAY 186. The speed limit is 55."
"But I thought I was on highway 55. Silly me. Phew, I'm glad you didn't catch me an hour ago, when we were on S.C. 228. No wonder my wife's over here white as a sheet and gripping the O.S. handle!"
But what got me on this S.C. tangent was an interesting fact I learned recently: last year, South Carolina's governor signed a resolution making one of my favoritest foods in the world -- boiled peanuts -- the state's official snack food.
I like how those people think. Seraphim, let's call the realtor, put the house on the market and pack our bags -- I wanna move to South Carolina. :-)
Ciao for niao.
--Talmadge "I Brake for Boiled Peanuts" Gleck
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